Thursday Thoughts

**I do not have a coherent thought pattern today - just letting you know up front that this will be random and possibly not make any sense as a whole whatsoever.**

I've been feeling really good lately. Well, that's not completely true. I felt good yesterday and so far so good this morning. The past week has been interesting, both emotionally and physically. I've just been.... off.

I've been taking really good care of myself (although from the looks of my body, you'd think I've eaten nothing but IHOP and Olive Garden the past 5 1/2 months) working out, eating right and drinking plenty of water - so for that I feel... strong. However, my body has also been having a little mind of it's own. More than one night this past week I was up most hours with intense cramping in my stomach and lower back (so much that one night I threw up 4 different times) which was totally unexpected (and unlike any of my other pregnancies). I guess I'm making up for not throwing up at all in the first trimester?

Anyway, that has not been fun. I hate not knowing when it's going to hit (type-A, anyone?) and I do not take feeling well for granted these days.

Baby Boy is doing so well, even if Mommy is hit and miss. He's moving like crazy and I love that (already!) when I'm laying up next to Jeff, he can feel him kicking (and Jeff has taken to laying in bed at night with his hand laying gently on my tummy while his son tosses and turns and reacts to the gentle nudges of his Daddy while my heart melts). Natalie has gotten to feel him kick around in there as well and I love (love, LOVE) the constant (seriously, does he ever sleep!?) movement.

I feel like the theme song to this pregnancy is the same from... what's that kid show again??? You know, the one with the song, "There's a party in my tummy! So yummy! So Yummy!" Oh, yeah, YO GABBA GABBA (I hate that show, by the way) but that song is constantly stuck in my head because every time baby boy moves, I hear, "There's a party in my tummy!" now. I know. Nice. (And I warned you about the randomness, so if you're still reading, you can't blame me for the confusion.)

So, tomorrow night Jeff and I get to have a date night and I'm really looking forward to that. I LOVE being a parent, but sometimes it's nice to go a few hours without being called, "Mom" - ya know? A night to remember that I am indeed someone apart from the lunch packer, the chore chart maker, the band-aid hand-er out-er, the clothes folder ha! who am I kidding, the taxi driver, and the chef double- ha!. So, anyway, there's that.

The weather has been beautiful these days and Jack and I are going to go for a LONG  walk today (I'm trying to cut back on the working out a little bit and see if it helps calm down the cramping, which could be contractions, but I wouldn't know because I've never had one). I'm really looking forward to enjoying some sunshine this afternoon!

Okay, I'll be done for now. Hope you guys have a fantastic weekend and that wherever you are, you get a bit of the sunshine we're enjoying as well!

**Randomness concluded.**

I *Might Have* Monday {Semi-Extended Version}

I might have slept in past 9am both mornings this weekend. It's been years since I've slept in so late (two days in a row) - so if, in fact, it actually did happen - it might have felt a little like heaven.

Today, I'm paying for all the sleep, though. My house looks like a family of five was here all weekend hanging out, relaxing, cooking, not cleaning, and generally having a good time making a disaster of their home great memories all the while forgetting not caring that there will be a time when it all has to be cleaned up again. Wait. Yes. That's exactly what happened.

Knowing that today was inevitably cleaning day, I made a to-do list (as I do every morning because I'm weird like that). I squeezed "make a to-do list" on the top (right above blaze-a-trail-through-dirty-laundry-to-the-washing-machine) so that I could cross at least one thing off before I (technically) got off track doing something that wasn't on the list (coughbloggingcough).

So, all in all, I might have had a great weekend. I got good sleep, I had fun with my family, and we made memories (which is way better than keeping the house clean). Now I have to go make a check-mark next to "detox the house from this weekend disaster."

Alrighty, I'll catch y'all later... like say, when I get bored of cleaning.

 ::Spoiler Alert:: I'malreadythere.

JOY

[I don't really know how else to preface this post except to say that these are mostly just random thoughts on being "joyful" that have been marinating in my brain the last couple of days. Coherency is not guaranteed, so read at your own risk.]

Is there a difference between happiness and joy? Can you still have joy while being sad, upset, disappointed, or frustrated?

Through weeks of frustration and trying to find "joy" even in less than desirable circumstances, I'm realizing that it all comes down to what I'm focusing on. When I feel like my circumstances are not ideal, I focus on them {how to change them, then feeling guilty that I'm complaining about them when really they are nothing compared to what others face, and it goes on and on}.

When it comes right down to it, I'm being selfish. Plain and simple. I'm trying to take matters into my own hands and "fix" everything, when it's not my job. I wasn't designed to be a fixer, I was designed to need a fixer. And that's where the "joy" part comes in...

When I'm focusing my attention on Him and not on myself or my circumstances I can't help but be joyful. I mean, seriously, the God who created the universe calls me His own child. Is that not amazing!? He cares about me. He cares about my circumstances and He wants to be a part of every single thing I do, think, and say. He wants to be my best friend. I just have to let Him, and when I do, all the other stuff sort of just falls away and I can get a glimpse of how little it really matters...

...But it's when I have my eyes focused on myself that I really struggle because lets face it. I mess up all the time. PERIOD. Life happens. Kids are disobedient. My patience gets lost somewhere between toothpaste smeared all over the tile grout and kids using spatulas as drum sticks on the bottom of upside down tin buckets. If I tried to find joy in my own strength I would {and do} fail. Epically.

That's why I need to have tunnel vision. I have to have my heart open to His will and my eyes and ears focused on His truths, and believe them for myself! When I simply seek Jesus, my daily circumstances  end up having nothing to do with my heart's contentment because my heart ends up being so filled with the joy of the Lord and so set on what a gift it is to simply be His child and live in the grace Jesus provides that the temporary happenings of this earth can't touch the depth of joy in my heart. When I think about it - about HIM - how could I not be filled with JOY? Are you?

"May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." Colossians 1:11-14

The One Where I Was A Copy-Cat

I'm borrowing this from my sister who did sort of an "about me" as her last post and I loved reading it! (And not just because she said I was her favorite blogger...)

So, here it goes - join us, I can't wait to read yours!

• Favorite time of day - Evening. My time with the kids AND Jeff is priceless to me.
• Favorite season - Fall (by far!)
• Favorite month - October
• Favorite holiday - Thanksgiving (it's all about family, and simply being together and being thankful - how awesome is that!?)
• Favorite subject in school - English
• Favorite channel - HGTV
• Favorite color - Green and purple. And blue. And orange. I like a lot of colors.
• Favorite song - Alli Rogers "Who Is This God"
• Favorite movie - Blindside
• Favorite celebrity - Julia Roberts, Rachael McAdams and Mark Ruffalo
• Favorite kind of music - I don't know - depends on my mood really.
• Favorite tv show - Parenthood
• Favorite thing to do - Going on a date with my husband. They are few and far between these days.
• Favorite place in the world to be - My husband's arms (did you just throw up in your mouth?)
• Favorite hobby - What's a hobby again??
• Favorite kind of animal - Dogs - big dogs. I don't care too much for the small lap dogs that seem (to me) to be more of like glorified cats. (One exception: My brother's Min-Pin, Mina.... now that she doesn't try to eat my children anymore.)
• Favorite place to live - In the country
• Favorite place to vacation - Vacation... hhmmm. I haven't had enough of these to make a solid decision.
• Favorite restaurant - I don't really have one... but I like most of them since it means I'm not cooking or cleaning.
• Favorite food - Lasagna
• Favorite thing to cook - Lasagna
• Favorite drink - Coffee
• Favorite chore - Vacuuming
• Favorite makeup - Bare Essentials/Minerals
• Favorite hair products - Biolage
• Favorite lotion - Victoria's Secret, Very Sexy
• Favorite perfume - If I don't smell like bananas, glue sticks, or a cleaning product I don't complain...
• Favorite memory - When Jeff and I graduated from college, because they were both such proud moments for us (we had worked together so hard to make it happen) and it was great to see how proud our parents were of both of us, too.
• Favorite blogger - Way too hard to pick just one! (Jackie, Brittany, Renee, Allison, and Katherine to name a few)
• Favorite thing to blog about - My crazy-awesome kids!
• Favorite book - "Redeeming Love" by Francine Rivers
• Favorite Verse - Romans 8:28
• Favorite thing to wear - Cardigans and Converse
• Favorite kind of day - Rainy day spent inside with family (fire in the fireplace, playing cards, dinner in the oven, coffee brewing, wearing jeans and a hoodie - perfection)
• Favorite job - Raising babies with my hero-hubby

Your turn!