Words

It's been a week tomorrow and I still don't have the right words. I just - I just...I don't know.

My heart is broken.

I am trying so hard to savor each moment and recognize it's beauty (even if it's hearing my kids argue and complain - at least  can hear them - there is so much beauty in that).

One thing I believe is that God is still good. He is just and loving and faithful and righteous and there is no bad in Him. He loves each and every one of us. Yes, we (as flesh beings) make bad (horrible and unthinkable) decisions sometimes and that hurts the heart of God, but because He gives us free will - bad stuff still happens - but HE is still good. He is here to cover us with his love and see us through the days where we feel like we just.can't.go.another.minute. He'll carry us.

I choose not to live my life in fear even though it is my first instinct when something like this happens but to trust that my mighty God will bring good out of every single thing that happens here on His earth. Because He promises that He will (Romans 8:28). I trust that. I trust Him.

Even though there are countless unanswered questions, I will not doubt the goodness of God and I will be grateful for my days, working as diligently as I can to bring (through Jesus' presence in me) glory to His kingdom through each of them.

Those Grandparents, I swear.

This is what happens when I leave my kids alone with my parents:

No, Fischer is not wearing capri pants, his overalls were just riding up. {Add here all the other (countless) stuff I could say about this picture...}

Might Have Monday (on Tuesday)

I might have stashed all the Christmas presents I've bought in the back of the closet (starting in September) and the closet might  be full. I should probably start taking inventory wrapping!

Photo Credit

I might have reheated a stack of pancakes that were sitting on the counter from breakfast for Jack's lunch today. Don't judge me they hadn't been eaten on or anything. It's been a long morning month.

I might have cried a little on the inside when I found out that the Bunco party I was going to go to this Friday night was cancelled. I was so looking forward to a night out - I might not tell my family about the cancellation and still pretend to go.

We started Fischer (almost 7 months old) on a little bit of solid food this weekend. After his first solid-food-poo I might have realized that cloth diapering has just gotten REAL. (And I might feel like I should get a medal after every rinse-out.)

Photo Credit

What things might you guys be up to lately?

Little Pieces

Jeff's Grandma makes these for everyone on their side of the family. You get one for your first Christmas in the family. They make my heart SO HAPPY. I just love his Grandma so much!

Last week we got two fish (our first - technically they were Natalie's fish) and they died in less than 24 hours. She made the (rookie) mistake of naming one of them "Lucky". Neither of them were too lucky.

I turned 32 on Sunday. Some days I can't believe I'm "only" 32 (with a 10 year old and having been married for 11 1/2 years it sometimes feels like I should be...older) and some days I can't believe I'm already 32. Crazy how time flies.

Our family was asked to do the Advent Candle "ceremony" (for lack of better word) at church on Sunday. The fact that the kids are excited to read in front of the church makes my heart happy and makes me feel less guilty for giving them the LONG passages and saving the short one for myself.

I got our Christmas cards done and ready to mail off this morning. I ordered them on Wednesday morning (online) and they were dropped off at our house via FedEx on Thursday afternoon. FAST.

This is the picture we used for our Christmas cards this year. (I KNOW. I love it!) :)

We're going to be in a circus parade tonight. Weird, I know. One of Jeff's best friends works for a tractor company (the green and yellow brand) ;) and they're having a "float" in the Junction City parade and asked if our family would like to join them on it. It's going to be so much fun! The kids were stoked when we told them that we were going to GO to the parade - I wish I had video taped their reactions when they found out they were going to be IN the parade. Priceless. (I'll take pictures tonight to share with you.)

 Fischer had his 6 month check-up last Thursday and besides the Bronchitis he was diagnosed with (which was no surprise to me), his doctor said he had all the indications of hip dysplasia and ordered an ultrasound for the following Tuesday. We were not excited at the thought of the hip dysplasia (Jeff had it as an infant). After praying all weekend for it to miraculously turn out to be nothing - it did! Praise God!

Fit Friday: (I know - it's been a while.) I've lost 2 pounds over the past 3 weeks. Honestly, the scale was at a stalemate for 2 weeks (between Thanksgiving and my birthday - just - UGH) and then finally moved this week. I've been working out at least 3-4 times per week and keeping up with my calorie counting and it finally showed on the scale this week so I'm happy about that.

Total lost: 48
Still to lose (to ultimate goal): 12 (This includes a LOAD of toning, which I've been working on, and can see a huge difference, but seriously I feel like I have a long way to go.)

Post workout. Obviously. ;)

Hope you all have a fantastic weekend.

(I'll have a "Might Have Monday" post on - you guessed it - Monday.) :)