A little emotional. (Okay, a lot.)

This morning I had to change sheets on the bunk-beds for the zillionth time this month and I hit my head on the top bunk when I was climbing out from tucking in the top sheet. (There's a goose-egg on the back of my head). And I cried. Not because of the pain, but because hitting my head gave me a reason to.


I spilled my coffee all over my alarm clock this morning when I was gathering up the dirty dishes that were piled on my nightstand (don't ask). I'm not sure if I was more upset by the alarm clock getting soaked or because the inside of my coffee cup was suddenly unoccupied. Either way, I cried. Again.

I realized (as I was trying desperately to organize our space in the upstairs of my parents house) that no matter how many times I rearrange all the crap stuff in our bedrooms, we simply do not have enough space for me to not feel claustrophobic not to mention the fact that we're adding another CHILD to the mix in a few months. And I cried yet again.

Then I remembered last night when we were laying in bed and listening to our three older kids deep breathing in their sleep (in the room connected to ours by a wall that goes 3/4 of the way to the ceiling) that my husband put his head gently on my belly and whispered sweet words to our baby as he held my hand. And I cried some more.

I might be an emotional wreck lately, you guys.

(Still living vicariously through me, Jackie?)

*Might Have* Monday

I might have taken my kids out to Chinese food for lunch yesterday after church knowing that they'd get extra sleepy, hoping that they would take a nap all the way home so I could enjoy my coffee (and my music!) on the way home in peace...

I might have realized this weekend that Christmas is only two weeks away (did you know that, you guys? TWO WEEKS AWAY) and I'm no where near ready. All the presents we've purchased are still piled in the back of the closet where we've been tossing them as we've brought them home. I really have no recollection of what's in there, much less what we might still need to get. (But for the love of Dave Ramsey, don't tell anyone how bad I was this year with making things such as Christmas lists... and a budget. Ahem.)


I might have a pile of laundry that's bigger than my car (and it's a big car) waiting to be washed, but since I was up all night coughing and my throat and chest hurt pretty bad today, I'm choosing not to care. And I might have set up the DVD player so Jack could watch his favorite DVDs over and over again while I attempt to make up for some of the sleep I lost last night.
And last but not least:

I might have felt the baby move. You know, the baby that's residing inside me? Yeah, I can feel it in there. I forgot how amazing that is. So right now I don't really care that we're unprepared for Christmas, or that I could get a full-on workout just by climbing my mountain of laundry because the little person that I've been having a hard time grasping the concept of  kicks me. And I like it. A lot.

procrastination at its finest

I'm a procrastinator. Do you like how I say that as if you guys couldn't already tell that just from how amazingly well kept my blog is? Ha!

Anyway, yeah, I put stuff off. Semi-important stuff... like ordering gifts online in time.

I'm awesome at ordering stuff off the internet (I mean, I do have my debit card number memorized) but I'm not awesome at taking note that just because I order it at night doesn't mean it will be there the next day in the mail.

We had decided to get the boys new Bibles for Christmas. I went to a couple of different places to look at them but they weren't on sale so I decided to look online. Last night. I found exactly what I wanted so I quickly ordered them and was happy to be done with it.

...until I read the email they sent me after I had already placed my order and paid.

"Expected arrival date will be between December 18th and December 28th."

Uh... oops.

Also? I ordered our Christmas cards online this morning.

I knew that since we haven't done it before now there was NO way we'd have time to dress all cute and pretend to be all happy as we pose for the perfect Christmas card picture (and lets be honest, nothing can top last year's "Ugly Christmas Sweater" edition) so... I just used our pumpkin patch picture.

Is that bad?

I guess if there's anyone who would use a pumpkin patch picture as their Christmas card, it would be us. So, there you have it.

Hopefully my procrastination will make you feel better about your own Christmas progress. How's it all going for you?

It's sharing day.

It's my birthday today, but because I'm feeling generous I've decided to share something with you for my birthday. (You're welcome.)

We're due the beginning of June.

And no matter how shocked you think you are right now, I guarantee it can't top our shock (and we've known for a couple of months!).

You know, what I've been up to and all that...

Ever have those days when you wake up and you just know you're not going to get anything productive done so why bother?

I'm just going to call that... November.

{Thus the cobwebs on my blog.}

Natalie and Jack both had birthdays (Happy Birthday!) right before Thanksgiving so that was crazy and I'd love to share pics of their party with you all, but I haven't seen my camera for 3 months and counting (do you know where it is!?). So yeah, there's that.

Then a few days later I decided to be brave totally got roped into Black Friday shopping with Jeff's sisters and mom. We only agreed to go if we didn't have to get up before 6 am much to Jeanna's dismay, I'm sure. Turns out when you get to all the stores as the crazies are heading home for their mid-morning naps you can have a really decent time shopping! We all got great sales ($420 for a $1000 washing machine anyone?!) and seriously had a great time (especially since we were all coffee'd up). I hadn't ever gone before well since that one time when I was 9 and was forced by my friend's Mom into Fred Meyer at 4am to get socks on sale... NOTHANKYOU and I'm actually looking forward to going again next year. (Thanks, Jeanna, and sorry for ever doubting you.)

Other big news? It's SATSUMA SEASON! Please tell me you're as excited about this as I am. Seriously you guys, we have to have a "satsuma budget," especially since they come into season the same time the holidays do. It's rough, real rough, I tell ya.

So, I'll be back (it's okay, you can laugh) to tell you guys all about the creative crafts and projects I'm doing with my children to get into the holiday spirit (I can't even type that with a straight face) - but you know what I mean... (And I hope you do, because I'm not so sure that I do.)

Hugs and holiday joy all around... and stuff.

October Overview (because I'm *that* lame)

Well, this month just flew by, didn't it?

It seems like October just started (possibly because the wonderful "October weather" I love so much finally showed up this week) and now it's almost over! How did that happen... and where was I!?

The second weekend of October I had the privilege of attending Women Of Faith in Portland with my mother in law, sister in laws (more commonly known as "my sisters"), my brother in law's girlfriend (you follow?) and another friend (related now through the initiation that was hanging out with all of us for the weekend and living to tell about it).

It. Was. Wonderful! I loved every minute of it. It was my first time attending and lemme tell ya, if you ever have a chance to go (and you're a woman) GO! You will NOT regret it. I promise.

While I was kickin' it with my girlies, my husband was at his parent's house (sans his Mom, she was with me, remember?). Him and his Dad held down the fort with our kids and they had a weekend of camping. In the driveway. They were planning on taking the kids camping (away from home) that weekend, but something came up at work and Jeff couldn't take Friday off like he had planned, so they ended up camping at home. They made a campfire and roasted marshmallows. They slept out in the camper in their sleeping bags. They laid on the floor of the living room and watched the stars through the skylights. They had a wonderful time and I am SO blessed to have a husband who encourages me to go and do things knowing not only will him and the kids survive while I'm gone, but they'll all have an awesome time.

The next weekend the five of us (hubby, kids and I) travelled up to Portland to visit our great friends who just had a new baby girl. It was wonderful getting to see them (and meet their precious baby, Raegan). Renee (another bestie) flew down to Portland from Alaska that week (to also meet the baby) so it was double the fun that weekend! Good for the soul, I tell ya, real good.

This last weekend was filled with card games at Jeff's parents' house, chopping and stacking firewood, church, and raking leaves. Good times with the family, that's for sure.

During the weeks we've had homework and soccer and I've been trying to keep everything together in my head (you know, who has gym on what days, when library books are due, what papers I'm supposed to correct and which ones I'm just supposed to sign - they don't make it easy, folks, they sure don't). I'm loving this life though. Feeling unbelievably blessed to have such a wonderful family.

How is your October going?

Do-Over

This morning was one of those kind of mornings.

The kind where everyone around me wishes they, well, weren't.

The kind where I hear my own tone of voice, my own harsh words, my own impatience, and just wish I could change it, but for some reason I feel incapable of that seemingly impossible task.

I'm not overly tired. I do not have a tough schedule today that I am unprepared for. I was not up all night with littles.

I do not have an excuse.

However, I realized that...

I have not been in the Word.

I have not spent much time in prayer lately.

Even though my life is not particularly difficult (thisveryminute) it feels difficult because I feel disconnected from Him. When my relationship with Him is suffering (because of me, it's never because of Him) every relationship I'm in suffers.

So, after apologizing to my family (via the drive down the driveway to the bus stop, and an email to my husband) I'm calling a do-over.

Starting fresh with forgiveness.

Because after all, wasn't that His whole purpose from the beginning? We all need Him and we all need His forgiveness.

We all need a do-over.